Where you were ten years ago today?
I do! I was sitting at my Mom's bedside. Just two days prior she had turned 80 years old. I had planned to be there for a celebration, (when one was planned) but I had been called to say "Good Bye".
I arrived late night on the 3rd of July. On the morning of the 4Th, I bounded over to the window, threw open the drapes and exclaimed on the beauty of the day. It was a beautiful day. Sun was shining, Skies were clear but Mama said, "Oh Get that light out of my eyes."
I laughed and promptly closed the curtains. I apologized for hurting her eyes and gave her my best good morning hug. That is how I began my fourth of July, 1999.
How dare the day be so bright? How dare the skies be so clear?
I want to scream,
"My Mama is Dying, Should not the world stop for a while. Just a while, to let me savor a few precious minutes and days with her."
I had my Mom for ten days, I sat with her, sang to her, prayed for her and cried for her. I more than once fell asleep holding her hand and crying.
But God had bigger plans for her. Plans To rest in him.
Have you ever lost someone and stood in silence and wondered why the world kept turning? I did for that entire week, I wanted to world to silence for a moment.
But everyone else needed the world to keep turning. Life goes on.
Mama would have been 90 years old this week, and I STILL miss her. I miss her every day. I think of her in everything I do, All she taught me, all she instilled in me.
I may have been wayward at times, but her voice was always in my head.
I can still hear her say, "Carolyn Sue, you know better than that."
Or this one, "Will you Kids Never Learn?"
Yes Mama I learned and learned well. You would be proud of the Woman, Wife, Mama, Grandmother, Aunt, Sister, and Daughter, I became.
I think a good daughter, One with your values and ideals.
I miss you today and forever.
He maketh me to lie down in Green Pastures,
He leadeth me beside the stillwaters.
Psalms 23:1-2
3 comments:
Sue,
What a loving tribute to your dear Mom. I'm sure she is smiling down at you from Heaven.
I hope your 4th was nice. We had nice weather and a fun day. This morning I have to soon get ready for church.
Have a blessed day.
Hugs,
Renie
I know just how you felt. As the days of last Dec passed, I sat by Darlene's bedside, held her hand and tried to come to terms with what was happening. Life can be so hard sometime.
I was at my brothers taking care of his premature daughter, so that my mother could be with her mother in her last days. What really sad, yet joyous days those were, We had lost my sister-in-law just 6 weeks prior only 8 minutes after giving birth to a premature baby girl, that was perfectly healthy, for tht we were so joyous. Then lost my grandmother just 7 weeks later. We had also just lost my dad's brother. In all I think we lost like 6 or 7 family members in just 3 short months.. But the Grace of God brought us through it all..
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