Another Good One

Made me Laugh, good medicine.


Banned from Coles, didn't like shopping there anyway.
Yesterday I was my local Coles buying a large bag of Purina dog food
for my loyal pet and was at the checkout queue when the woman behind
me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had - - an elephant?

So since I am retired and have little to do, on impulse, I told her that, no
I didn't have a dog. I was starting the Purina Diet again.

I added that probably I shouldn't because I ended up in hospital last time,
but that I'd lost 10 kilos before I woke up in Intensive care with tubes
coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her it was essentially a perfect diet and the way it works is to load
your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time
you feel hungry.

The food is nutritionally complete so it works well, so I was going to try it
again. (I have to mention, here that practically everyone in the queue was
now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked me If I ended up in intensive care because the dog
food poisoned me. I told her, No, I stepped off the curb to sniff a
Rottweiler's backside and a car hit both of us.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard.
I am now banned from Coles.

Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the
world to think up daft things to say.
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